That's what you get for getting into the office late (even with enough compensation hours to spare that it didn't matter that I was late to begin with) - all hell breaks loose and you end up being the only one to finish fixing it. And now it's past the time to catch even the SEVEN o'clock train (so the seven thirty'll be mine..) which means it'll be darker than a black steers tucas on a moonless prairy night before I ever see my front door again. And until then there's nothing to do than to wallow in movie quotes and grumble that I wasn't even supposed to be here today !
Well, ok. I was supposed to be here. I guess.
But I *should* have just called in sick and slept in. I sure felt like it, even after oversleeping.
This sucks.
Monday, January 30, 2006
Peak an' Burn.
I had a great week last week. I started a new webcomic based on a completely zany, nay, insane idea and produced a whopping 6 episodes of it before the end of the week. I drew quite a few drawings for the TekenTopic on ClickBurg and amongst them were several I could be quite proud of. Work was going swell as well. Friday evening I went out with my oldest and still pretty much best friend Tom and we had a great time - and that seemed to be the peak.
Saturday afternoon I'd overslept and had to hurry across the country with a bigass suitcase, while drawing as best I could with new (inferior) fineliners while on the train in order to make the NetScythe midnight deadline by the time I got home. I made the deadline, and the episode actually doesn't look half bad. But by then the very awesome feeling of accomplishment and 'being on a roll' had watered down.
Sunday I wasn't motivated for anything. I didn't feel too healthy, either and decided to spend most of the day in bed. Then, of course, in the middle of the night I couldn't catch my sleep... this morning I overslept and made it to work an hour and a half too late, and most of my day so far has been spent tired, grouchy and, frankly, depressed.
Yeah. Just Another Peak 'n Burn. Business as usual, I suppose.
Saturday afternoon I'd overslept and had to hurry across the country with a bigass suitcase, while drawing as best I could with new (inferior) fineliners while on the train in order to make the NetScythe midnight deadline by the time I got home. I made the deadline, and the episode actually doesn't look half bad. But by then the very awesome feeling of accomplishment and 'being on a roll' had watered down.
Sunday I wasn't motivated for anything. I didn't feel too healthy, either and decided to spend most of the day in bed. Then, of course, in the middle of the night I couldn't catch my sleep... this morning I overslept and made it to work an hour and a half too late, and most of my day so far has been spent tired, grouchy and, frankly, depressed.
Yeah. Just Another Peak 'n Burn. Business as usual, I suppose.
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
La la la la all better now.
Well, there was some bus fallout and a strike, which meant I nearly missed my dentist appointment AND there was no way to get out of the small village that my dentist is located at, afterwards, but the tooth at least is fixed. And the aenastetic wore off within three hours, which isn't too bad either.
I even didn't mind walking back, so I started walking, and then caught a lucky break because an elderly couple in a car stopped and asked directions for something fairly close to my home. So I proposed that I'd drive along with them - of course, I didn't mention that I have the sense of direction of endangered-panda-sperm, causing us to see half of Tilburg before ending up in the right place. But still, it saved me about an hour's worth of walking.
And again: at least my tooth is fine again ! Wooo !
On a completely different note: to all you people sending me hatemail because I took your beloved Grim DotCom away and replaced it with NetScythe: Thanks for the hatemail, and please, keep sending more, I love this :)
A small thought for you all though: I animated 9/11 into a joke, I sent the pope to hell, I've took a swing at a major Dutch comic artist, and I've bashed women time and time and time and time again. No peep from any of you (the pope episode actually mostly harvested agreement email). So I can safely say that the rabid fans that a lot of other webcomic artists seem to attract, do not read this comic. You all seem to be a reasonable, intelligent, possibly even educated audience. So you didn't get upset over anything else I've done in the comic, and you love what I'm doing and seem to trust that I know really well what I'm doing. Until January 1st, when I did something a bit more drastic and you all decided to email me angry comments demanding that The Grim DotCom returns.
Honestly... you know me a bit by now. Do you really think that demanding something from me will make me comply ? I think it's good we're going through this, you and I, audience. I have a message for all the hatemail-senders out there (meaning my entire audience save one or two who haven't pressed 'send' yet)... and for that, all I have to do is quote a Grim DotCom episode. So here goes:
That's right, I'm in charge and you aren't. And as such, I don't take orders from any of you. If you liked the strip so far, I can only promise you everything will turn out to make sense and it'll all come together again eventually. That's right: show a bit of patience and confidence, NetScythe is an integral part of the bigger story. I am extremely aware of what I'm doing, and you should know that by now, after two and a half years. But hey, I enjoy a good laugh about more hatemail as well as the next comic artist, so by all means, keep sending 'em in :)
I even didn't mind walking back, so I started walking, and then caught a lucky break because an elderly couple in a car stopped and asked directions for something fairly close to my home. So I proposed that I'd drive along with them - of course, I didn't mention that I have the sense of direction of endangered-panda-sperm, causing us to see half of Tilburg before ending up in the right place. But still, it saved me about an hour's worth of walking.
And again: at least my tooth is fine again ! Wooo !
On a completely different note: to all you people sending me hatemail because I took your beloved Grim DotCom away and replaced it with NetScythe: Thanks for the hatemail, and please, keep sending more, I love this :)
A small thought for you all though: I animated 9/11 into a joke, I sent the pope to hell, I've took a swing at a major Dutch comic artist, and I've bashed women time and time and time and time again. No peep from any of you (the pope episode actually mostly harvested agreement email). So I can safely say that the rabid fans that a lot of other webcomic artists seem to attract, do not read this comic. You all seem to be a reasonable, intelligent, possibly even educated audience. So you didn't get upset over anything else I've done in the comic, and you love what I'm doing and seem to trust that I know really well what I'm doing. Until January 1st, when I did something a bit more drastic and you all decided to email me angry comments demanding that The Grim DotCom returns.
Honestly... you know me a bit by now. Do you really think that demanding something from me will make me comply ? I think it's good we're going through this, you and I, audience. I have a message for all the hatemail-senders out there (meaning my entire audience save one or two who haven't pressed 'send' yet)... and for that, all I have to do is quote a Grim DotCom episode. So here goes:
That's right, I'm in charge and you aren't. And as such, I don't take orders from any of you. If you liked the strip so far, I can only promise you everything will turn out to make sense and it'll all come together again eventually. That's right: show a bit of patience and confidence, NetScythe is an integral part of the bigger story. I am extremely aware of what I'm doing, and you should know that by now, after two and a half years. But hey, I enjoy a good laugh about more hatemail as well as the next comic artist, so by all means, keep sending 'em in :)
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Yikes, this is pretty scary, actually.
This morning, just before walking into my office, I got a message from my tongue saying it had discovered something.. unusual. A pretty big hole in my tooth, big enough to be able to feel it. Now, this sort of thing doesn't happen overnight, normally, and it's in a place where I've been drilled before, so I think I swallowed a filling over the course of the night.
However, I haven't made time to go to the dentist in quite some time - I've been, I now kind of regret saying, too busy. So I call my dentist, and the receptionist actually has to enter my data into the computer again. I had been absent long enough to be taken out of the machine. Whoops.
So I set the earliest possible appointment: Friday. And that was fine, in my mind, because of work - I don't work on Friday, so the job / department wouldn't suffer. Ten minutes later I started regretting it, because this thing is getting me more nervous now. From what I can feel there isn't that much tooth in between the nerve and the outside world, so it's not unlikely this will start to hurt like a bitch way before Friday.
So, a bit more freaked out, I called again, and this time stressed the situation a bit more. The earliest they could schedule me, even considering the situation, was tomorrow just before noon. Which'll mean I'll pretty much have to take the day off, because there really is no point in travelling all across the country after that. But my new state of mind right now is 'fuck that, I want this thing fixed ASAP !!!'
This is nerve-wrecking, to know that there could be some really bad pain coming my way, but not to know when it'll hit and how bad it will be. Teeth are scary things, and a major pain in the ass. (Of course, the ass is not an anatomically very usual place to put them) It's interesting how everything's in a different perspective today though: everything they expect me to do, a major server being down, etc. - it all seems a bit.. insignificant. My tooth, damnit, my tooth - THAT's important ! Screw the rest !
It's scary enough for me to wish I had a girlfriend right now (probably the first time in years) because I can definately use someone who'll comfort me and all that good stuff right now. This sucks !
However, I haven't made time to go to the dentist in quite some time - I've been, I now kind of regret saying, too busy. So I call my dentist, and the receptionist actually has to enter my data into the computer again. I had been absent long enough to be taken out of the machine. Whoops.
So I set the earliest possible appointment: Friday. And that was fine, in my mind, because of work - I don't work on Friday, so the job / department wouldn't suffer. Ten minutes later I started regretting it, because this thing is getting me more nervous now. From what I can feel there isn't that much tooth in between the nerve and the outside world, so it's not unlikely this will start to hurt like a bitch way before Friday.
So, a bit more freaked out, I called again, and this time stressed the situation a bit more. The earliest they could schedule me, even considering the situation, was tomorrow just before noon. Which'll mean I'll pretty much have to take the day off, because there really is no point in travelling all across the country after that. But my new state of mind right now is 'fuck that, I want this thing fixed ASAP !!!'
This is nerve-wrecking, to know that there could be some really bad pain coming my way, but not to know when it'll hit and how bad it will be. Teeth are scary things, and a major pain in the ass. (Of course, the ass is not an anatomically very usual place to put them) It's interesting how everything's in a different perspective today though: everything they expect me to do, a major server being down, etc. - it all seems a bit.. insignificant. My tooth, damnit, my tooth - THAT's important ! Screw the rest !
It's scary enough for me to wish I had a girlfriend right now (probably the first time in years) because I can definately use someone who'll comfort me and all that good stuff right now. This sucks !
Monday, January 02, 2006
The upcoming year in review.
While everyone and their pet AIBO is making End Of Year lists and looking back, needless to say - for loyal readers and close friends, at least - I'm busy looking ahead. 2006 is going to be an awesome year, or at least one I'm heavily looking forward to. 2005 was a stinker of a year for me on a personal level, but that's good, because it'll be so much easier to have a good year right after that.
Of course, my rebellious 'looking forward' is actually a cloaked 'looking back', but hey, chances are you're all still hung over and half asleep when I publish this, so it will be weeks before anyone bursts that bubble. Whoops, I just did, myself.
2006 will be a year in which I'll return to making webcomics. Sure, I made webcomics in 2005. The Grim DotCom. Some comics at the Tilburg Fair. And a guest comic or two here and there. But really, that was nothing. I wasn't soaring, growing creatively, reaching for the skies, expanding my horizons - I was mostly doing what I already know how to do. I was too busy to do anything else. And I hated being too busy to do anything else. I have been piling interesting ideas up on a shelf, the past year, because I knew I wouldn't have the time available that they would take if I had followed them through. If I had followed them through well. And there's no point in following through good ideas badly. So they've been collecting dust, and it's high time I start dusting some of them off.
2006 will be a year of no more organizing. Well, I may have to eat those words. But the intention is there: none of the endless 'little' crap that's involved in organizing, anymore. And no more ClickBurg. I've done it, I've paid my - well, some - dues in that field and I've found out how much time and energy they cost me. I can't afford it. Not if I have to do the things I want to be doing.
A lot of people keep telling me I have a great 'talent' for oranizing. That's nonsense - what they mean is, I got the job done on several things I was organisationally involved with. But all I did was wat anyone with some common sense would do: say 'it is NOT impossible', then chop everything up into small, performable actions, and going ahead and DOING them. Time for other people to discover it's just that easy. I feel I'm meant for other things. I'm not saying 'better' things, note. OTHER things. I'm not 'above' organizing. It's just something I can't be doing this year, because I have other things I have to be doing.
2006 will be a busy year, work-wise. It may also be the year I leave my current employer. I don't know yet, but it's been on my mind for years. It won't be anytime soon, but the moment may come this year that I decide enough is enough, my role in this story is finished, and I need to move on to a new one.
But until then, I plan to take my job pretty seriously. This department currently direly needs every bit of help the employees can offer, and I intend to do my part. We're not out of the storm yet, and there's still a few heavy winds to take.
2006 will be a year of me trying new things. I got a short taste of being on stage recently and it was interesting. The most interesting part was that it offered different outlets for some of my ideas. And I managed to combine it with outlets I'm more experienced in, which enhanced the set of ideas as a whole, hugely. I was intrigued. And I finished the (small) project with a major feelin of accomplishment. Sure, I had to wear a dress. But screw that, it was a successful artistic endeavour and I pulled it off more than properly. I liked that feeling. I want that feeling again. Of major projects involving lots of things I've never done before that all fall in line together. I'm not saying I'll necessarily go on stage for anything again in 2006, mind you - but I've found that I can. So who knows what kind of live performances might follow.
Most importantly of all... 2006 will be a year where I'll finally make an honest attempt at taking more time for myself. I'll try to have a lot more fun, a lot more rest, and tend to areas of my life and personality that have been heavily neglected this past year to allow focus on other things. And that, I think, will be what I'll like best about 2006 this time next year. If I fail at that, 2006 will have been a faillure altogether. Because it's high time that there's a year again that will be my year.
So. What are YOU going to get out of this year ?
Of course, my rebellious 'looking forward' is actually a cloaked 'looking back', but hey, chances are you're all still hung over and half asleep when I publish this, so it will be weeks before anyone bursts that bubble. Whoops, I just did, myself.
2006 will be a year in which I'll return to making webcomics. Sure, I made webcomics in 2005. The Grim DotCom. Some comics at the Tilburg Fair. And a guest comic or two here and there. But really, that was nothing. I wasn't soaring, growing creatively, reaching for the skies, expanding my horizons - I was mostly doing what I already know how to do. I was too busy to do anything else. And I hated being too busy to do anything else. I have been piling interesting ideas up on a shelf, the past year, because I knew I wouldn't have the time available that they would take if I had followed them through. If I had followed them through well. And there's no point in following through good ideas badly. So they've been collecting dust, and it's high time I start dusting some of them off.
2006 will be a year of no more organizing. Well, I may have to eat those words. But the intention is there: none of the endless 'little' crap that's involved in organizing, anymore. And no more ClickBurg. I've done it, I've paid my - well, some - dues in that field and I've found out how much time and energy they cost me. I can't afford it. Not if I have to do the things I want to be doing.
A lot of people keep telling me I have a great 'talent' for oranizing. That's nonsense - what they mean is, I got the job done on several things I was organisationally involved with. But all I did was wat anyone with some common sense would do: say 'it is NOT impossible', then chop everything up into small, performable actions, and going ahead and DOING them. Time for other people to discover it's just that easy. I feel I'm meant for other things. I'm not saying 'better' things, note. OTHER things. I'm not 'above' organizing. It's just something I can't be doing this year, because I have other things I have to be doing.
2006 will be a busy year, work-wise. It may also be the year I leave my current employer. I don't know yet, but it's been on my mind for years. It won't be anytime soon, but the moment may come this year that I decide enough is enough, my role in this story is finished, and I need to move on to a new one.
But until then, I plan to take my job pretty seriously. This department currently direly needs every bit of help the employees can offer, and I intend to do my part. We're not out of the storm yet, and there's still a few heavy winds to take.
2006 will be a year of me trying new things. I got a short taste of being on stage recently and it was interesting. The most interesting part was that it offered different outlets for some of my ideas. And I managed to combine it with outlets I'm more experienced in, which enhanced the set of ideas as a whole, hugely. I was intrigued. And I finished the (small) project with a major feelin of accomplishment. Sure, I had to wear a dress. But screw that, it was a successful artistic endeavour and I pulled it off more than properly. I liked that feeling. I want that feeling again. Of major projects involving lots of things I've never done before that all fall in line together. I'm not saying I'll necessarily go on stage for anything again in 2006, mind you - but I've found that I can. So who knows what kind of live performances might follow.
Most importantly of all... 2006 will be a year where I'll finally make an honest attempt at taking more time for myself. I'll try to have a lot more fun, a lot more rest, and tend to areas of my life and personality that have been heavily neglected this past year to allow focus on other things. And that, I think, will be what I'll like best about 2006 this time next year. If I fail at that, 2006 will have been a faillure altogether. Because it's high time that there's a year again that will be my year.
So. What are YOU going to get out of this year ?
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