Spiraling even faster and deeper down into total exhaustion. Right now to the point that I'm fed up with my 'posse' friends and my roommate. They all went out yesterday and had a splendid time without me and with no realistic means of me contacting them. I got home from the departure drink of a much appreciated colleague in Amsterdam, by 7 30, but no one was there. I first just lay on my bed for hours with some music on, incapable of anything else anymore.
Then when I had a tiny bit of energy again I dragged my sorry old carcass downstairs and actually really enjoyed having the house to myself. The only thing ruining it was knowing my roommate and 'his' friends could return at any time. And they did, at 2. Blah. It was ok, I guess, hanging out for a while watching Coupling series 3 which I was watching. But this morning one of them (who slept over in the guest bedroom) and my roommate took off at 10, obviously not bothering to say goodbye or anything, and I wasn't sorry about it one bit. They'd woken me up but I remained in bed pretending I was still deep asleep and I couldn't wait for them to fuck off.
I then got up and took care of a few things online that needed to be done, then leapt back into bed for another few hours to sleep more. Of course, just then, my roommate had returned and threw in a load of laundry.
IT'S STILL IN THERE. And I really need to do some as well, because the last couple of times that I should have done it he also sneaked in before me and I decided to wait. And of course waited and waited and waited and then the weekend's over and during the week I don't have the time to wait for the laundry to finish and put it up on the line. So now I'm on the verge of running out of clothes and the asshole AGAIN leaves his fucking laundry in there. And I knocked on his fucking door but he apparently has headphones on, and if I just open the door to ask him nicely to take out the laundry, he's gonna give me about the biggest fucking attitude - I've been there before, trust me. I keep putting up with this shit of his, FUCK !
So I *EMAILED* him now. Several hours ago. Does he check his mail ? No.
I wish he took a god damn vacation for a while or something. Leave the country, go have fun. Or stay over with our friends who are slowly becoming YOUR friends. Fuck, all I want is some peace and quiet. The house to myself. Freedom to do the things I need to do. And some god damn rest. No obnoxious coughing. No 'hey dude' everytime he walks by. None of his breakfast on MY POOLTABLE. No attitude about anything I want or need to do. No bitching about the cats being allowed to go outside. The absence of his friggin' carcass in MY hammock.
I'm overreacting, but really, I could do without him for a while. And without my so-called friends. And without everyone. Including the much before-mentioned 7-year crush girl. And work. And even the comic artists.
I just want some rest. Plenty of people seem to get it, so why can't I ? Isn't THAT something I can ask for my birthday ?
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