More Words from the Vocabulary Vulture.

Well, I know that whoever is still reading all of this is most likely not that interested in how I'm doing and other inane babble about, say, my comics 'n such, so let's just dig into the newspapers of today, shall we ?
- 'Antitabaksverdrag' (anti tobacco treaty). The war on smokers has reached the excess of an actual treaty signed in Geneva, which the WHO wants enforced worldwide. Still, I have my doubts that this requires three words to be thrown together into one.
- 'Billenknijpen' (butt sqeezing). Note the difference between the Dutch version and the English one ? That's right - a SPACE. It's TWO words, folks. The verb is *not* in the dictionary as one word.
- 'Toekomst-mentoren' (future-mentors). This is a cute label for college students in Amsterdam going to help out underprivileged kids sort out and get on their way in regards to plans of the future. I nearly didn't nominate this, because the initiative is admirable, and the word *was* written between quotes in the paper. But when I look at the word out of context, I have to admit, it makes no sense. The addition of this word to Dutch language is not helpful to its progress.
- 'Scheepsarcheologie' (ship archeology). Let's illustrate this by a discussion I had about this word with a colleage, shall we ?

colleage: "No no, that word exists, seriously."
me: *checks the dictionary* "Nope, it doesn't."
colleague: "Well, then they just forgot to put a dash in there."
me: "Nope, the dictionary doesn't recognize the version with a dash either."
colleague: "Er... well, then someone just forgot to add a space between the words."
me: "Right. The word 'scheeps', used seperately." (To Dutch people it's obvious here that this word is never used seperately)

NOMINATED !

- 'Telefoonterreur' (phone terror). This is too rich: the phone company has invented some kind of internet trick to let you click on someone's phone number, then fill in your own, and then you can call to that number through your computer. Apparently it doesn't check wether or not that actually *is* your own phone number, so it can be used to call some number repeatedly just to harrass them. And *that* they call phone terror. Quick, George, get the nukes out ! Axis of Evil !
- 'Openluchtbordeel' (outdoors brothel). Er. Errrrr. Outdoors.... brothel ? Isn't the whole point of a BROTHEL that it's INDOORS ? How does this work ? Isn't this just outdoors prostitution ? Why does the word 'brothel' need to get thrown in there ? Or is this a brothel with the roof missing ?

Tough decision today. But the last Word of the Day of February 2005 has to be... 'Toekomst-mentoren' !

Easy Like Sunday Morning

I can't sleep yet. I blame it on the adrenaline of hurrying through another Grim DotCom-episode - I was late ! The episode wasn't up at midnight, for the first time since I started this comic ! I'm deeply ashamed and want to apologise to the fans of the comic - albeit I'm unsure how few of you there really are who actually *follow* the strip, in contrast to just the casual readers. Might only be one or two. In any case, I blamed it on ClickBurg, and rightly so if you ask me - although it's not so much the fault of all the work that goes into ClickBurg as the fact that there's only 24 hours to a day, combined with the discovery that I'm only human and there's only so many things even I can do in a week's time.
In any case, I can't sleep yet (although my body and eyes are willing to give it a try) so I thought I'd pick the word of the week, get that over with, and work all day tomorrow on a side project I was hoping to have finished by now (and I'm not even completely halfway yet).

So what nominations did this week produce ?

Monday: imamopleiding
Tuesday: fakejeeps
Wednesday: biermoeheid
Thursday: vogelpestpandepedemie
Friday: patateter
Saturday: silaa7

There's no competition here, really. I only have to look at the list to realise, that the Word of the Week is: vogelpestpandepedemie !!!

Ok, my roommate came home from going out with some of our friends (I had hard labour for the webcomics world to do of course so no social life for me) so I'm going to leave you all and I'll be back Monday again.

Lost In Transgression.

On days like these I don't want to play Language Cop anymore. I mean, honestly, you don't know where to begin, and to make matters worse, I'm even late with my next Grim DotCom episode ! So I'm going to give you a quick but no doubt incomplete rundown of a few things that only took me seconds to find:

- 'Poppenseks' (puppet sex) - from an article about Team America, of course. Is this word intended for all situations where puppets have sex with one another ? How often will that be ? And does it in- or exclude sex between humans and puppets ? And animals and puppets ? And - good god, even *my* sick mind wants to stop thinking about this now. Bad word. We don't need it !

- oh ! The 'stoeptegelincident' story returns ! By now it's a murder, and to decide the guilty one from the two main suspects, DNA-testing will now be involved. The murder is labelled 'viaductmoord' (overpass murder). Come on, folks. Overpass murder ?? As *one* word ?? Why ?!! And to make matters worse, the article also invents the word 'risicoviaducten' (risky overpasses).

- 'betalingsbeschermingsverzekeringen'... *takes a deep breath before figuring out the translation of THAT one* 'payments protection insurances'. You have to admit, it's a gem. Imagine having a job where you have to pronounce that all day. The size your tongue would be when the day is over !

- 'bemoeizorg' (meddle care). The label was necessary to put a face to more proactive (and even, judging from the article, forced) care for people in troubled families when they don't voluntarily go get the help and care they require. I'll admit, considering the other gems I've found today, this is a weak one. On a quiet day this would have been a real beauty to mention.

- and this story is too good to omit: apparently the government took over half a year to figure out what the word 'silaa7' means, which was found on a list of items that were necessary to prepare an attack on the government and a nuclear power plant. Apparently the word is easy enough to find in the Arabic-Dutch educational dictionary, and apparently it delayed the case for the full half year. Even our intelligence agency, our national criminal investigation agency, and our national forensic institute had been put on figuring out the meaning of the word and couldn't figure it out. In the end, someone simply googled it (which is impressive, because I only get one hit on that word, and I couldn't figure it out from that one page). (For the record, it means 'weapon')

So, despite all the great candidates for the Word of the Day today (and admit it, there are some real beauties in there), for once the Word of the Day is awarded the title for different reasons. The Word of the Day is 'silaa7' and let's hear it for all the bright minds in the Dutch offices of authority ! *Applause*

Since this made me laugh so damn much, I can't claim to make an impartial decision on what the Word of the Week will be, so I will pick it tomorrow (which is what the original idea was anyway) and if you'll excuse me now, I have a lot of writing and drawing to do before midnight. Wish me luck !

Lavishing you with Linguistic Litter

I know you all must have missed me like crazy yesterday, but I was too busy - it was, for once (and today I feel very strongly that it also was the last time), my day off instead of Friday, I switched them around. Of course I also packed that day full with activities, and towards the evening I had to go to The Hague, where I unexpectedly stranded and had to stay over with some friends. All day I was only online for about a total of half an hour I think, and even then I had lots to do, so I didn't get round to the Word of the Day of yesterday. At least I didn't get round to it.. online. I did, however, pick up a newspaper and picked a word or two that I thought were definate candidates. I'll first run the picks of Thursday by you, and then today. That should make up for it - right ?

- 'Griepgolf' (flu wave). No. Nonono. The article also uses the perfectly acceptable word meaning flu epidemy, there really is no reason whatsoever to speak of a flu wave. Especially in the light of the recent tsunami tragedies - have a heart, folks !
- another epidemy: 'vogelpestpandepedemie' (bird flu building epidemy). *just sits and stares at the word, trying to figure out why.. and what the HELL it means*
- economy news: faith in the Dutch economy amongst citizens is reportedly restoring, and the article gratefully uses these words: 'consumentenvertrouwen' (consumer trust) and 'producentenvertrouwen' (producer trust).

There was also the word 'hoofd-naar-voren-en-weer-naar-achteren-muziek' (head forward and back music), but since it came from a column-like review of a disco (which was written in a more personal and creative way), I'll let that slide. I'm feeling generous.

And the winner of Thursday was... 'vogelpestpandepedemie' !
*continues to sit here and look at the word for a couple of minutes, then shakes his head and goes on*

Now, I do believe I owe you a Word of the Day for Friday, too, don't I ? Let's see what the media have slipped into their articles then.
- news from my own city: Tilburg is the first in the Netherlands to get a dispenser for vibrators and other sex toys. This thing of course needed a name (as it usually goes) and it consequently got labelled 'erotiekautomaat'. (erotica dispenser)
- the policy of club bouncers who reportedly keep people out on racist grounds, needed a label as well, and the choice was made to call it 'horecadiscriminatie' (catering industry discrimination). How many ways can you interpret this word, exactly ? It's mindboggling, honestly. Let's kill this word of quietly now before people new to the Dutch language bust their minds on it.
- 'patateter' (french fries eater). You have to understand: it's reasonably difficult in this country to find someone who never ever eats french fries. So we're talking about a large section of the population - but is the fact that they eat or have at some point eaten french fries common ground enough to justify a label instead of solving this with a combination of two or three words ? I love how it sounds when you try to say it, too. Patateter. Patateter. Patateter. It's like a machine gun.
- 'hoefijzeropstelling' (horse shoe formation). I've checked, the word doesn't exist. Since the context is that three jeeps were lined up in this formation, I take it that they stood in a sort of circle which reminded the author of a horse shoe. But, again, how clear is this word ? And do we need it ? Why doesn't anyone seem to stop and think about these things ?

Luckily, these are all the gems I have for you today, and once again, I get to dictatorially pick the winner. The Word of the Day is 'patateter'. Patateter. Patateter. My tongue hurts now.

Book 'em, Danno.

Some more crimes against the Dutch language:
- an article that mentions the word 'gesteggel', which comes from the verb 'steggelen', which is mostly a dialect-spoken-word (meaning to have a debate about something) and isn't actually in the dictionary. There are also plenty of alternatives for it, and I was taught in school that newspapers really oughtn't to be using words that aren't in the dictionary (just as that they should follow the correct current spelling of words, etc. - because, after all, for a lot of folks they're the main source of current Dutch language that they read). So technically the word exists and a large amount of people know it, but it really shouldn't be in the newspaper.
- an article that notes getting plastic surgery done on your genitals is becoming more and more common, that mentions the word 'lippen-lift' (I don't think I need to translate this one). Obviously it refers to 'face-lift', but in a face-lift, the face actually gets lifted, and from what I gathered from this article, the 'lips' don't...
- There's an article about 'multivitaminen' (this one should be obvious too), which, let's face facts, folks, is a BRAND NAME here. It's quickly becoming a common word, following the long tradition of 'refridgerator', 'super soaker', etc. but I'm fairly certain we could talk about these things without having to use the brand name of one particular type.
- but.. the word of the day is.. 'biermoeheid' !
Translated it means 'beer fatigue', and it's from an article where breweries are noticing that the A-brands of beer are being consumed less. This one nearly made me choke on my morning tea with laughter when I read it. It's indesputably the Word of the Day !

More Linguistic Decay

Ok, I have a couple of candidates I want to tell you about. I've already made my choice for the Word of the Day, but I thought the others were interesting to mention as well.

First off, GoGo tours has set up a special website, dumpjeschatje.nl. It's a site filled with tips on how to dump your beloved before your vacation, because statistics show that most young people prefer going on holiday without a proverbial ball and chain beside them. So the site is full of 'dumptips'. As usual, I feel this didn't need to become one word.

Another article tells us that the city of Amsterdam isn't too pleased with the advertising campaign of Transavia, who have put images of weed plants on their buses in Barcelona. The word the newspaper invented for this is 'wiet-promotie', but:
- Transavia is promoting their bus rides to Amsterdam, not weed.
- Amsterdam is upset because of the association of Amsterdam and weed - they're not concerned with the promotion of weed itself.
- In short, weed is not being promoted. The word is, simply, incorrect.

There's an article about troubles with handicapped students in the Dutch equivalent of high school education. Apparently the teachers are complaining about the workload these students bring with them, who are also referred to as 'rugzakleerlingen' (backpack students). I gather from the article that this is already a common term, but the only association the word conjures up in my mind is students with backpacks. Of which, let's face it, there are plenty. And I'm fairly certain only a minority of them is handicapped, so it's not exactly something I'll think of first with this word. But I guess the word is already very common, so it automatically falls outside the selection.

But the Word of the Day *has* to be this word, from the headline of an article about the phenomenon of SUV's. In the headline, and in the article, they are referred to as 'fakejeeps' - I don't think I need to translate this one. Because it's English. Two English words, merged together in a very Dutch fashion. This word would not be in use in English, and it should not be in use in Dutch. There's no competition here: it's the unchallenged Word of the Day.

.... And We're Back.

Well, that was an.. interesting week. At 26 years old, I'm now president of the first webcomics foundation in the Netherlands, possibly the world. I've also handed out a lot of flyers (and several enthousiastic people helped me out there), the ClickBurg organisation T-shirts have been printed, I've attended the comics convention in Rijswijk the past weekend, I've been interviewed a few times, the ClickBurg press release made it all the way to the ANP which is basically the Dutch Associated Press, and, and, and.. good grief, I don't even know what the hell I've been doing with my week off anymore. It seemed like an eternity and a lot has happened. I honestly wouldn't have been able to maintain the Word of the Day that week, so I made a wise choice in not watching the media for it. I haven't even been able to spend much time drawing, either, which bugs me because that was one of the main reasons I took that week off !

But I'm back. And despite the fact that, amongst many other things, I'll be heavily redesigning the ClickBurg site this week, I intend to report more monstrosities in 'new' Dutch language. To start it off: today I had no trouble spotting the Word of the Day. It's 'imamopleiding'.

Now, an imam is a religious leader of the islam society. There are several in the Netherlands, and obviously, with all the bad press the islam society has received due to the murder of Theo van Gogh and the threats to politicians who even had to go into hiding, and the ensuing debate about integration having failed, this nearly made the front page. Apparently a start has now been made with special education for imams, who are seen as some of the causes of muslims not integrating into Dutch society and a 'them versus us' mentality.
However, the word suggests that it's an education to become an imam. It's deceptive, because in essence it means imams will be educated to fit 'our' society better. Seriously, folks, I love to see all the spin doctoring that's being done, but the articles for instance also mention that women are also allowed in the education, but won't be able to become imams in practice since the islam doesn't allow it. This is an extremely transparant training to mold the islam belief so that the islam society poses less of a threat to the rest of us. Which is fine in itself, but good grief, the spin doctoring and halleluyah sentiment that surrounds this kind of news is enough for me to proclaim it the Word of the Day in my usual dictatorial style. And I'll be doing it again tomorrow. To another word in the media.

Time's Up.

Yes, I was late, but I had to get groceries, pull some work for ClickBurg, get the newspaper that had my interview from yesterday, and I spent seven straight hours on the new episode of the Grim DotCom which went online just in time before midnight (two and a half minutes to spare). I'd say it was a pretty busy Saturday. To top it all off, I had to watch Kentucky Fried Movie while it was on TV. That goes without saying. However, I have a newspaper in front of me now, so here goes.

The Word of the Day for Saturday is: 'huurpiraten'. Literally translated it means 'rent pirates', but can you imagine its meaning out of context ? What, there are guys with eyepatches and parrots on their shoulders, going after your rent cheque with a heavily worn down sword ? No, of course not. You *could* imagina that it means people who rent a home illegally. Sure. But no, technically speaking it should be 'verhuurpiraten', letting pirates, because this is not about people who are renting, but about people who are letting. Ridiculous word, and I won't stand for it.

And to further clear my schedule for Sunday, here is a rundown of the Words of the Day from last week:

Monday: 'kastelozen'
Tuesday: 'veiligheidshiaat'
Wednesday: 'antispyware'
Thursday: 'snertkoken'
Friday: 'care-miles'
Saturday: 'huurpiraten'

And the Word of the Week is:

Care-miles !!
I'll even tell you why: not only is it an English word, it's obviously based on air-miles, which, albeit a marketing trick word, has become a common concept here in the Netherlands, but the word has its merit: you are indeed, in a way, saving a mile of air travel each time. But the airmiles have changed in time as simply some kind of bonus points that you save, and that can be spent on more than just flight tickets, and so it seemed obvious to the insurance company CZ to talk about care-miles. It's not, however. You are not saving miles of care. Really, folks. It's a stupid word.

On that note I take my leave from all of you for a week, during which time I'll be working on my secret comic project (all will be revealed in due time), on The Grim DotCom (I really do need to restore some kind of backstash, today was insane) and of course, as seems usual lately, on the ClickBurg convention. And the only way to make that week have the slightest semblance of a vacation is if I at least don't obsessively try to hunt the Word of the Day down in the media. So no Words next week: they will return again starting Monday, February 21st.

Something Priceless From Tilburg

Alright, sorry I'm late, but you won't believe how busy I've been today. I'd also like to take this opportunity and let you all know that the upcoming week, I'll be taking time off work but also off here, to work on my comics and on the ClickBurg convention. So no Word of the Day next week, it'll return after that. Sorry folks.
But, I'll do my best to find one for today (Friday - yes, as I said, sorry I'm late) and tomorrow (Saturday - yes, technically that's today. Get over it.), I promise.

And boy, did I ever find a great article in the Volkskrant today. It took me all of three seconds to find since it was wham, right in the middle of the front page. And it's about something in my own city, Tilburg !
Ok, here's the short summary: the article is all about a special bonus for their employees, of a whopping 100 euros (wow, who can resist THAT offer ?!) if they take extra effort - in their own time, of course - to get in good shape and health. You know, excercise and all those other terrifying words.
Now, I suppose it's not quite as fascist as what Michigan-based health insurer Weyco pulled (firing anyone who still smokes, and announcing that overweight people are the next group of employees forced to quit their unhealthy habits or quit their jobs) so I won't actually criticize the idea. It's ok, it shows that the insurer cares about the image of the company through their employees, in a positively encouraging way that doesn't actually FORCE anyone. So I'll leave the message itself alone. But boy, did I find some amazing words in there...
First of all, the idea is called 'fitwerker-plan' (I think you can figure that one out if you know that 'werk' means to work). They eventually want to expand it into a national 'fitburgerplan' (fit citizen plan), in which context they use the words 'Care-miles', 'ren-je-rijk-bonus' (run yourself rich bonus), 'vettax' (fatness taxes) and to be able to pay for all this they want to set up a 'Nationaal Fitburgerfonds' (National Fit Citizens Fund). I mean, is this article priceless or what ? Not one, not two, but SIX new words introduced into the Dutch language that could have easily been expressed otherwise.

However, fair is fair, there is only one Word of the Day, so I have to choose, and in my ever dictatorial wisdom I have chosen the word 'Care-miles'. And that's that.
Tomorrow I'll return with the last Word of the Day for this week. I promise. And yes, tomorrow is today. Go to sleep, insolent one.

Time for another lineup.

Thursday, and feeling all encouraged from the fact that some completely meaningless person took offense to what I'm doing here makes me want to put in extra effort today ! So here goes:
From Spits:
- from one and the same article (front page in fact), two words: 'Antiterreurplan' and 'radicaliseringsprocessen'. The first should be rather obvious: anti terror plan. The second one refers to muslims being taught to become radically opposed to certain aspects of Dutch society in their mosques, and means, literally translated, 'radicalisation processes'.
- from an article plugging a special train that will be driving this autumn in celebration of our queen's silver jubilee, 'evenemententrein', meaning event train.
- from an article about the World Championship of cooking pea soup, a special word for that: 'Snertkoken'. I mean, after all, it is such a special activity that splitting it in two is pointless, and it's set apart from cooking anything else so much, that we need this label. I understand this. Don't you ?
- I hate to get repetitive, but I also found the words 'antiterrorismeconferentie' (anti terrorism conference) and 'tsunami-baby' (aka. 'Baby 81', a Sri Lanka baby who survived the tsunami and who now has two families fighting over being its parents - DNA testing will be done).

I'll admit that, after all that, I decided to read the rest of the Spits newspaper for today a lot less attentively - I mean, too much is too much. I also ignored the Metro and Volkskrant for today. So without further ado, the winner: the Word of the Day, selected completely undemocratically and without any justification for my choice, simply because I can and because if it pisses you off I'll simply laugh:

Snertkoken !!!

Comment on my little mission...

On the GeenStijl blog, some guy who calls himself NoCigar (wow, I do admire the originality some people display in choosing their online pseudonyms so) decided it was necessary to comment on my Word of the Day rants, specifically the last entry:

Verder keek ik even naar het blog van een van de amateur-tekenaars: in sukkelig, gebroken en slecht Engels klagens over de taalverloedering m.b.t spyware: nl. mensen die de term "anti-spyware software" gebruiken uitmaken voor 'morons' en zelf VMBO-Engels gebruiken.
Zinloze Flapdrol.

Let's review, shall we ? To translate:

I also took a quick look at the blog of one of the amateur comic artists: complaining in clumsy, broken and bad English about the degradation of language in regards to spyware: to call people who use the term "anti-spyware software" 'morons' while using first-grade English himself. Useless turd.

Interesting is that the word 'klagen' got a completely useless 's' added to it, clearly indicating the level of intelligence of this commenter. He (or she ? Nah, I may not hold the intelligence level of most women in very high regard, but the dumb style it was written in clearly exhibits the male psyche in all its monstrosity) also completely fails to recognize what I'm trying to do: the Dutch language is getting swamped lately in useless labels, often badly constructed, unclear in intuitive meaning, and mosttimes consisting of words put together that could just as easily be kept apart in seperate terms. I'm not a language purist, and I believe a language has to develop and grow with time, but especially the media are overdoing it, so I'm nominating here, on a daily basis, words that I completely fail to see the use of. In the case of 'antispyware software' (note that there was no dash used in the word from the article I quoted, in contrast to what this fella NoCigar makes of it) could easily be solved as 'software die spyware tegengaat' or other combinations of common, already accepted words. We do not need the term 'antispyware software', folks, we really don't.
But hey, it's a free country, let him think what he wants and say it, too. I'm completely in favour of that. In fact, the erroneous assumption that my English is of the most base level doesn't even bother me, but I thought I'd point out once more what I aim to do here.
Thank god it is a free country and I'm free to do on my own blog what I damn well please. If anyone else has a problem with it, I would like to comment I couldn't fail to care more strongly than I do now. You don't have to read it. Continue to read media articles filled with useless labels, please. I won't stop you. I'm merely taking notes here.

How IT Ruins Our Language.

Ok, I get that we might want to use a hip label like 'spyware'. Fine. But do we need 'antispyware' ? And, even worse, do we need 'antispyware software' ?? Do tech journalists ever even THINK about the language they use ??
Seriously, folks. 'Antispyware' is the Word of the Day. And I'm very tempted to add 'software' to the term, exactly as it was used TWO TIMES in the same teenie tiny article.
Antispyware software. What do you think the 'ware' in spyware stands for ???

God. Morons.

Chairman of disasters

You no doubt are kept a bit up to date on current events in The Netherlands if you read this daily. You know, for instance, about the famous fireworks disaster - well, apparently, after FIVE YEARS, someone in Dutch politics deemed it necessary to appoint Pieter van Vollehoven (pianist, friend of our Royalty, and, for no reason anyone can explain, apparently important) as chairman of the Onderzoeksraad, which is a board that will investigate the causes of disasters, accidents and incidents in the fields of defense, transport, industry, healthcare, nature and the environment. I am not making this up ! According to mr. Van Vollehoven, the Netherlands need to become clearer on who is responsible in cases like the fireworks disaster, because too many people are wondering things like why did the government let this happen, why didn't they take action before. This sentiment, the unclear divide between governmental supervision and corporate responsibility, he labels a 'veiligheidshiaat', a safety hiate. A safety hiate ? Er.... a lack, a gaping hole, in safety. Is it really the same thing ? And do we need this word ? I say no on both counts. Word of the Day !

Caste-away.

I'm, again, outraged. I think the Words of the Day that get me worked up the most are those in relation to messages of people being treated like they're not people. Today the newspapers are reporting about victims of 'the' tsunami (you guessed it, 'tsunamislachtoffers') who are being denied help by India's authorities, and who aren't even counted in the body count. Why ? Because these poor folks are not part of a caste. That's right - the religious elite caste-system of India apparently goes THAT far, to deny even the most common compassion to people who are not in the 'in' crowd - yay for religion ! Isn't it wonderful ? Doesn't it just enrich the human experience ? I for one am now completely convinced of the value of religion, aren't you ?
So here goes.. the word of the day, since the journalists deemed it necessary to use one word to label these people without castes: 'kastelozen'.

And Now For One Ahead Of Schedule.

Since I want to spend my Sunday on a few things, possibly even *not* working on something creative (although I likely will be doing that after all), I've decided to go ahead and post the Word of the Week early. Not too much early since it's nearing eleven, so in a little more than an hour it wil be Sunday anyway, but still.

I first want to put a nuance in about my previous posting. I'm reminded of a clever line from the (rather bad) movie 'Lost in Space', that if you don't have time for fun, what's the use of saving human life ? So in all fairness, if people want to spend their time in decadent ballroom environments, all the best to them. I fear that it's more a matter of taste than of its ethical place in society. It's not my taste, and to me it's like our Dutch royalty: pointless and if you ask me it can be easily done without. But some people do find it fullfilling, so it's not my place.
Still, I think it doesn't require an actual 'ball season'.

Ok, the nominees from the past week:

Monday: Lynndiën
Tuesday: computermotor (when used to mean Operating System)
Wednesday: vuurwerkramp
Thursday: hortensiaplunderingen
Friday: nieuwspersonen
Saturday: Balseizoen

And the winner is... Lynndiën.
The Word of the Day will return again Monday. Enjoy the weekend, folks.

An Ode To Wastes Of Time.

Today's Word of the Day is Balseizoen. Let me start of by saying that much.
Balseizoen means 'ball season' - but it's not a soccer term or anything, it refers to the phenomenon gala ball, you know, where reasonably rich people dress up in outrageously expensive suits and dresses and dance or talk while accompanied with so-called classy music, often in a beautiful building with top of the line food present etc.
It may be the working class in me. It may be that, despite for having a bit of a taste for class, truly formal events make my neck itch. It may be that the banker / insurer I work for employs too many people that might go there. It may be my strong aversion against the rich. But I've always felt that there's nothing, absolutely nothing, more decadent and useless than a Ball. It's a huge waste of time for people who have the luxery to waste time - which they could very well have spent useFULly. And to make matters worse, the amount of people involved as staff and service at such a ball: all THEIR time is wasted as well.
I think, given all that, it's obvious I love this word. Ball season. There's a specific TIME, in which, apparently, gala balls (and opera balls, which was what the article was about) are held. There *is* such a thing as a ball season, and if there's one, there's bound to be several (unless it's something like the hunting season).
I wonder who sits around and discusses the ball season. What's special about THIS ball season. How it compares to past ball seasons. Speculations on future ball seasons, given the trends of past ones. People who may even deliberately take time off to enjoy the ball season.
IT FRIGHTENS ME.

It's today's winner. Deal with it. I don't have time to debate it.

Quick Read For Today

Still not well, which is annoying, because now it's on my own time and I have things to do. Anyway, I only peeked into the Metro for a few minutes today, and yet again I hit jackpot as far as I'm concerned: there's a short article in there about the Tokkies, who gained national celebrity as being the most anti-social family in the Netherlands (yes, that's what it takes to get your fat mug on TV here these days) and who have now been selected as 2004's most important people in the news in a poll amongst High School students. Or, as the header of the article calls them 'nieuwspersonen' (news persons).
I tried looking further but then my eye caught a photo caption elsewhere on the page which talked about 'black light' by which they mean a blacklight, which in Dutch should simply be called 'UV-licht' so I decided to quit while not too annoyed yet.

Another late round of the media.

I decided to give up on the last day of my working week as well. Amsterdam just feels a bit too far away when you're still capable of coughing up half of the pizza you ate last night, you know ? And when your nose produces enough - ok, I'll save you the gory details. Let's just say that, although I am getting better every day, it was probably in the best interest of my clients, my colleagues, and everyone in the Netherlands who travels on the same trains as I do, that I stayed home one more day. So, again, I made sure to sleep in some, and left my body to do what it does well. On a positive note: I haven't worn my illness acceptance sweater yet. Yes, you read that right. I have one sweater, just one, and it's a hideous thing if you ask me, but righteously and poetically so. I must have had the thing for some fifteen years or so, as well, and it's probably one of the least-worn pieces of clothing in my closet. I only wear it when a germ gets me to finally buckle down and admit to myself 'ok, you know what, this is nuts, you are sick and cold and you need to dress WARM now - admit defeat and ride it out.' So whenever you see me walking around in a really dorky, greyish, squiggly-horizontal-lined, middle-aged square man type sweater, you should steer clear because I'm carrying dangerous biological weapons on me that haven't completely been neutralized yet. I'm not ready to admit defeat just yet right now, though, so the sweater's still in the closet where it belongs.

Ahhhh.. that felt nice, actually. Blogging about something else than the Word of the Day. If you know me at all you know I *hate* routines and always try for variations in everything. But, meanwhile, it *is* business as usual today, so I should also start the search for the ever elusive Word of the Day.
On a positive note: Metro published an article about the fatal victims of the tsunami, and what term did they use ? "Het officiële aantal Nederlandse dodelijke
slachtoffers van de tsunami in Azië" - translation: the official number of Dutch fatal victims of the tsunami in Asia. Now, I realise it was Spits, not Metro, that introduced the word 'Tsunamidoden' about two weeks ago, but still, I like it when I read these kinds of things. That's what they are, folks, NOT 'tsunamidoden'.
Will return later today with whatever oddly chosen label I might be able to scrounge up from today's newspaper articles.

Edit: ok, that didn't take long, about fifteen minutes in fact, and same newspaper. Either I'm easily satisfied today (aka lazy) or they're making it very easy for me.. Metro, Metro, Metro.. I had such high confidence in you today. You were doing so well. You carefully avoided 'tsunamidoden'. Then there was a small follow-up article on another old news item where you carefully avoided 'stoeptegelincident'. Nicely done ! But then you got overly confident, when you got to an article about the Dutch area known as the Noordoostpolder, where there are apparently large-scale thefts of hydrangea (in Dutch: hortensia's) and you mention the words 'hortensiadieven' (hydrangea thieves) and 'hortensiaplunderingen' (hydrangea plunderings). I am so disappointed in you ! I know I'm ill, but damn, if you *are* going to contain the Word of the Day, at least make it a challenge to find, and also don't make me pick between two words in the same teenie tiny article.

The winner of the day, big thanks to the Metro (who I'm not angry with, just saddened by) is... hortensiaplunderingen.

Weak Wednesday.

Well, I had a long tough discussion with my body this morning when I had to get up, and my body won: it was indeed wiser to stay in bed today. So for most of the day, I was unconscious while my body took on this rather stubborn germ that's been a nuisance the past days. The battle hasn't fully been fought yet, but I feel quite a bit better, lemme tell ya. (Of course, I always claim to be feeling better when I'm ill, so there's no way for you to know wether or not that's true)
Still, oddly enough that still made for quite a tiring day, so now that I'm trying to find the Word of the Day, the fact that the site of the Volkskrant is being an ass (I'm getting proxy error after proxy error) makes me give up on them, and the only other newspaper I bothered to check online is the Metro. After just a page and a half I'm terribly annoyed with the news already. I mean, page two, top of the page, it mentions that our queen, according to her new autobiography, had doubts before her ceremony (you know, where she turns queen) wether or not the ermine cloak she wore would have been the correct thing to wear. There's an article about increased discrimination towards aziatic and muslim people... Hello, can you compare these two ? Muslims can have any - excuse the formulation but it's relevant here - skin colour on the planet, but 'aziatic' is clearly intended to indicate skin colour and a few other racial qualities. We're, plain and simple, talking about increased racism against ethnic groups in The Netherlands of which the majority is known to likely be muslims. Stop pretending they're discriminating muslims, they're discriminating marrocans and turks. And I hate using these words because to me - I hate sounding like Gregory here, but it's true - they're all just people.
But this one tops it all of that page and a half: there was a big bunch of explosions in a fireworks company that wiped out part of the city it was in, in 2000, and here's how these things go in this country: the lawsuit is STILL ongoing !!! (And I don't remember too clearly, but it probably took at least a year to start up, as usual, too) So I hereby nominate an old classic from the media of that time, mentioned again in this article (and never ever used in any other context except in relation to the explosions in that company !!) -- 'vuurwerkramp' (firewors disaster). That's about as good as I'm willing to find for you folks today - sorry, but I kind of have to be a bit selfish today. Perhaps I'll make it up to you all tomorrow. René out.

Two Day's Worth Of Words Because I'm Late.

I haven't managed to find the Word of the Day this monday - I had a good candidate, 'aanzuigende', but it was actually in the dictionary. I haven't had time to find another one because my working day has been really busy, right after work the train ride was disasterous, and I had the rest of my evening booked solid with ClickBurg-related stuff. On top of it all: I'm ill. For the first time in three days I'm willing to admid it: I'm ill - I have been since saturday, and yes, I am the stereotypical wannabe-tough guy who doesn't let that bother him and keeps working at everything, but truth is, for three days straight I've been minimally productive.I'm doing the best I can, but right now I don't have a Word of the Day. Simple as that. I'll try to find TWO tomorrow, one of which should have appeared today. Watch this post, I hope to update it later.

Update 1: First, the Word of the Day for Tuesday: "Lynndiën". This has everything to do with Lynndie England, the female soldier who was photographed in front of tortured prisoners in the Middle East. Apparently the picture is being parodied online so much with all different people in different situations that this craze is now called 'to Lynndie someone'. I read the article and - understandably, I hope - don't expect to find any better Word of the Day for Tuesday.

And I should have just taken the time to go to the Volkskrant site yesterday, because there is a gem of an article there, written either by or for a complete computer-nitwit. It talks about peer-to-peer software while calling it 'virtuele ruilbeurzen', virtual trade fairs, it clearly deals with 'victims' who were just too stupid to shield their computer properly or even put their files in proper places, yet calls it a major threat to THEM (whereas if you ask me, people like that should have their PC taken away from them immediately) -- but really, when you mention the Windows OS and call it a 'computermotor' (I don't think I need to translate that one) I really don't know whether or not you're taking a piss. I fear the worst, since it wasn't an especially hilarious article except for the used terms...