I Have Something To Say.

I've been having two big fights - I'd call them arguments but no doubt she'd call them fights - with Sionnain this past week. There were several reasons for them. For one, I'm exhausted as I've never been before.. perhaps it's the 24 Hour Comic (on top of all the work I've been doing for months on end) followed by the past, up to the last minute, stressful working week. A lot's been going on, I am barely able to deal with what's been hitting me, and therefor I have very little patience with other people right now. I was supposed to be hanging out with Michelle, an old friend, tonight, but she called earlier today and rescheduled for friday two weeks from now. I haven't seen her in ages so it'll be good to catch up. Alternatively, I could have hung out with my 'posse' tonight, because there was a big get-together tonight in the city of Waalwijk, but I decided against it. Both cancellations make me glad now, because I would have been dreadful company. I could go to the bar now and pray for a bar fight, but I haven't seen one there since I got there (the occasional pushing around maybe, but they have security now, so even that is rare).
Another very big reason is that I feel my friendship with Sionnain has reached a point where certain things have stopped being cute. I'm sure there's things I say or do that have begun to bug her, but with me, it's her constant insecurity. It's the diet obsessions with her weight, it's her constant need to reassure her own self worth by what 'great' men are interested in her, etc.
So here goes.. to all women I dedicate this post. Because I think it's time you all learnt a few things about us men.

Contrary to what you may believe, men are very ok with emancipated women. Women who have their own lives, their own jobs, who empower themselves as fully equal individuals. We LIKE this. Sure, there are always stupid men, who can't deal with successful women, or who are brainwashed into the traditional marry-get kids-get old life. But in the end, that's all bullshit. Every man wants a woman to have her own opinions, stick up for herself, etc.
Mine is a generation of entirely unchivalrous men. We don't open doors for women (unless we feel a need to impress them, because for some anti-feminist reason this still works), we expect women to pull their own weight financially and otherwise, we expect them to be able to solve their own messes. Etcetera. We've been raised by the past-generation feminist and our eyes have opened to the fact that women, contrary to what tradition subscribes, are equals. Individuals. They have their own lives, their own friends, and they are with us because they CHOOSE to be. They are sexually liberated, and I'm sure you can fill out the rest of the list yourselves. That's all very fine. We're glad someone rang the wake-up call, because I can't imagine men being ok with the stupid, dogmatic approach that historically was the case.
So here's my message to women - AND TO MEN. It's about bloody time men emancipated, as well. We have had three decades of not knowing how to behave. What kind of behaviour is ok, how to deal with these 'new' women (since our fathers could never really teach us, this was all new to THEM as well), what to make of ourselves. The result: an entire WORLD of weak, indicisive, 'sensitive' men who have become the very opposite of what men traditionally were. And there's just NO WAY that that was the idea behind feminism. The idea - as I've always seen it - is that women fought for themselves to finally become EQUALS. Not dominatrixes, not having to deal with billions of weak, submissive men. Men today are CRAP.
So here's a thing or two you really should know about us. I am more than free to talk about this, because I'm an artist with a mission and there's no room in my life anymore for relationships. So I won't have an angry girlfriend after me - which is a very nice change from any other men that has written about this fuckin' subject in the past decades. YOU CAN'T TOUCH ME.
I'm the proverbial bad shoelace - you can't tie me down. Nobody will. I'm married to my art - this doesn't mean I'm necessarily lonely (I am now, but that's because I'm overworked and nobody bothers to visit me because they haven't heard from me in ages) because I can just go out, and if I really don't want to be alone tonight, I will bring someone home. I know this because it just seems to work that way for me. The next morning, we might enjoy breakfast or not, she leaves, and that's the end of that. Though far from ideal for most people, it works very damn well for me. I am a sexually liberated MAN and if I want to get laid and have a one-night stand that doesn't interfere with what I feel is important that I do, I go ahead and do it. This also makes me consider myself an expert in the field I'm about to discuss - male emancipation - because every fucker in the western world that has written about this so far is either an old-fashioned male chauvinist who's 3 decades behind on the times, or one of the beforementioned weaklings, afraid his girlfriend will beat him up for saying what he really wants to say.

Women: We don't want you if you're being STUPID. We really don't. The weak 'new' man may constantly reassure you that he 'understands' and he'll seem sensitive, and understanding, and supportive, but we're only doing this because we either fear you or because we hope there's some damn good sex (or a nice night of pleasant company) in it for us.
We do not care about your weight. We do not care how you look. Most women look damn fine to us, and so do you. We do not care about your FUCKING SHOES. We NEVER, EVER, look at your shoes. They don't appear in the total picture. So the thousands upon thousands of shoes you own, you MUST be wearing to impress yourselves. Or other women. Or gay men. Because the average, straight man, will NOT notice them. YES, THAT DRESS MAKES YOU LOOK FAT. We don't want to hear about your ovaries or any other medical annoyances, anymore than you want to hear about us having an itch on our balls. Or how our prostate is doing. We don't talk about it, you shouldn't either - not to us. WE DON'T CARE.
Dieting is about the stupidest thing on this world. You should do what feels good. Don't bother us with carbs, calories, and whatnot. We've never observed them, ourselves, in the past, and we will never, either. This is knowledge we can do about. If you REALLY WANT US to know about this, accept the fact that this takes space in our brains, that may be reserved for your NAME, or your BIRTHDAY, or the DAY WE FIRST MET. Bother us with too much of your crap, and we cease to care about ANYTHING.
We want confident women. Even if it's just a fucking pretense, we want them. Any confident woman can turn our heads. An insecure woman is mostly interesting if you want an easy fuck. Because the tricks to work our ways into insecure women's panties are well-known amongst men. SO START GETTING CONFIDENT. It's the only way you'll end up with a man who treats you as an equal and who is with you because he wants to be - and vice versa. I am SURE you don't want us kissing your asses every step of the way. And I don't care who WE are. Who WE are should NOT determine YOUR SELF-ESTEEM. You are not special because you are with someone. No. You are special for who you ARE. Or, for what you DO.
Drop the fucking diets. Be sexually liberated, but make your own decisions. Make up your own minds. Yes, this is scary. Yes, you, deep down inside, may want to rely on us for the world to make sense, or for practical things, or for empowerment. But FUCK THAT. Fix the plumbing yourselves when we've been so busy that we haven't gotten round to fixing it. Tell us - flat-out - that the house needs cleaning, because (despite the semi-feminist upbringing) we don't share your third sense for when living conditions become unacceptable. Keep in mind: bachelor men live in PIGSTY. Pizza's covered in fungus, porn near the VCR, things crawling out of the fridge. Get the clue. We are way too busy with still performing the traditional male-status-dance, AND with trying to figure out what kind of men we're supposed to be now that the 'new' women have changed the world, to stop and take a look around and figure out that our houses are filthy. If you want us to do the work, we will - just let us know. And learn to fix your own car. Stop being so damn dependant on us.
We'll care for you if you're ill, just as well as you'll care for us in the same situation. But we (I consider myself a healthy exception but then, my situation's a bit different from most) need to emancipate. Become MEN again. And you need to become WOMEN.
No, pointed shoes do not make you look sexy. No, most of us HATE piercings and shudder at any metal-on-skin that's on women. We won't notice you had a manicure. "What Women Want" was a STUPID MOVIE. It only served two purposes: to give women the idea that 'there ARE men out there who might understand us' and to give men a hearty good laugh about how rediculous women are, in the end.
Women are not emancipated. Even three decades after all the controversy, all most of them still want is to get married, keep secrets, tell secrets, make up, not having to put on make up, getting wined and dined, talk, etc - well, I'll break it down differently than the stupid joke. All women want is something they don't know. So they look to us to find out. Or to society. So yeah, then you're stuck with answers like 'I want to be a skinny, successful supermodel who acts, sings, is successful, cares for her man, is married with kids, lives happily ever after and whose life has had meaning'. Yes. Fair to say you won't archieve that most of the time.
The vast majority of women on this planet do NOT look like the women on TV. Yes, men are just as brainwashed as you are, and will therefore lust after the fantasy. But that doesn't mean you need to try so damn hard, pain yourselves, etc. to BECOME that fantasy.
All men want, is a woman who's not afraid to be herself. Who has figured out what she REALLY wants in life and who's not afraid to be alone, live her own life, have her own goals, her own friends, who's not afraid to be alone. Who is independent but CHOOSES to be with you.

This is controversial stuff I'm saying. Especially in the States. But fuck, I needed to say it. Even in my own country, many men are reversing to not knowing how to handle women anymore. There's whining all over the place because they've practically BECOME women. And women don't want to be with women - unless they're gay - but they never stop to wonder WHY NOT. Oh, that's right - because women are NUTS and IMPOSSIBLE TO LIVE WITH. THEY KNOW THIS. It just doesn't ever register that men might feel the same way. So please, everyone, take a clue from what I've just written. Guys, get a grip. Be a man. Girls, stop whining to us. We really don't give a rat's ass and most of the time we're only listening to either be polite or because we're hoping for sex. Deal with your own problems.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm extremely tired.